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When you thought I wasn’t looking

A message every adult should read because children are watching you and
doing as you do, not as you say.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw you hang my first painting on the
refrigerator, and I immediately wanted to paint another one.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw you feed a stray cat, and I learned
that it was good to be kind to animals.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw you make my favorite cake for me,
and I learned that the little things can be the special things in life.

When you thought I wasn't looking I heard you say a prayer, and I knew that
there is a God I could always talk to, and I learned to trust in Him.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw you make a meal and take it to a
friend who was sick, and I learned that we all have to help take care of
each other.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw you take care of our house and
everyone in it, and I learned we have to take care of what we are given.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw how you handled your
responsibilities, even when you didn't feel good, and I learned that I would
have to be responsible when I grow up.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw tears come from your eyes, and I
learned that sometimes things hurt, but it's all right to cry.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw that you cared, and I wanted to be
everything that I could be..

When you thought I wasn't looking I learned most of life's lessons that I
need to know to be a good and productive person when I grow up.

When you thought I wasn't looking I looked at you and wanted to say,' Thanks
for all the things I saw when you thought I wasn't looking.'

Each of us (parent, grandparent, aunt, uncle, teacher, nurse, friend)
influences the life of a child.

How will you touch the life of someone today? 

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply.
Speak kindly.

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Be Secretly Happy No Matter What Is Happening in Your Life

 Can you keep a secret? I mean, can you keep a really, really significant secret? If you can, then you have a big head start on holding yourself happy.

Tragedies of many "degrees" occur all the time. Happenings occur that are way beyond your control. How do you keep going?

Steve came through the door of my office looking as though he had been run over by a pickup truck and left for dead. He was literally dirty, clothes torn, blood dripping from his left nostril.
"What hit you?" was all I could manage.
"I just got mugged down town on my way to see you. That's way it been going these last several weeks," Steve said. (Not his real name.) "My life is a mess. I jammed up and my wife left me and took the kids. I was laid off the job that I had for 17 years. My mother died two weeks ago. Father was already gone. I am about to have my house foreclosed. I am just not happy."

Pardon me, but I almost laughed when he said, "I am just not happy." I managed to stifle the impulse, however. Steve didn't say that to be humorous. He said it because it tallied up his entire life at that moment.
We went to the restroom across from my office and got the bleeding stopped and his face clean. Then back to my office so we could talk. He told me the usual tale of how he had been raised to believe if he just had the right stuff, the correct job, lived in the proper neighborhood, drove a certain car, he would be happy. Instead, all these, plus his family, were gone in a few weeks time.

I said, "I'll teach you a confidential way. It won't heal your problems, but it will help you contend with them. Can you keep a secret?" I am sure this sounded much too light for him, but he was game for anything at that point.

I told him happiness resided on his inside, not his outside. I said to him that I was not making light of his circumstances, but the secret was he could be happy even in the midst of great discomfort or tragedy. He could always be happy if he remembered this secret and applied it in every circumstance.

"You have seen, unfortunately, first hand, that depending on outward situations does not bring happiness," I said. "You need to develop an inward hidey-hole, an escape-room, where your happiness is locked away. Then nothing can ruin you."

I told him all he had to do to have and keep this escape-room was to determine it was so. Decide that at the Core of the Universe, and therefore his own core, there was deep, profound and eternal Harmoniousness that nothing could trouble or destroy. He needed to latch onto that Harmony by being making contact with the Harmony daily. Taking just a few moments in a day to deeply center in on being happy on the interior. That he needed to see this happiness sending out rays to range over all possibilities.


Is there such a place within each of us? Oh, yes. Make no mistake, we are hardwired to the Core of Harmony of the Universe.

So, I told Steve, the world can be falling apart around us, yet we can remain enveloped in our happiness. Not as a means of permanent retreat from the substantial world. But as a place of evacuation where we can refresh our spirits and reach our strength for the disturbances in life. Steve left my office a little bit better off than when he appeared dirty and bleeding. As I communicated with him over the weeks to come, he was feeling much better about himself and his world.

You, too, can feel much better when you evolve and hold this secret base of happiness within you. It takes just a few minutes each day to retreat to this site of safety, to reequip yourself for whatever is happening in your corporal world. Does it solve problems? No. But it surely helps you contend with them. Decide now, right now, that you have this secret of happiness within you.

Author:  Dr Robert Henry Schwenk  Working with me through blogs, emails and newsletters you will be uplifted, given ways and means to make yourself even better than you are. You will be able to solve the problem you may have of low self esteem, knowing your own worth, feeling as if you deserve the best. Life is too short, I believe, not to be able to find someone to help you solve the problem of the meaning of life. I am here 4 U. In my works you will find the way to happiness, which is the meaning of life. I will help you find a way that leads you to happiness that is ever-present and everlasting.
To that end I have a few credentials: 40 years as a life coach; B.A. from Baldwin-Wallace College, M.Div. from Wesley Theo. Seminary, D.Min. from United Theo. Seminary. Have published two books, several ebooks, many blogs, over 150 articles on EzineArticles.com.
Sometimes named "The Maven of Meaning," or "The Harbinger of Happiness."
If you would like to contact me you can do so at drbob4u@gmail.com
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Letting Go.

I think so many of us are too hard on ourselves for what we didn't accomplish or what we should have done.  The first step is to forgive yourself for all the things you didn't do that you should have and all the things that you did do that you shouldn't have.  Get rid of the guilt.  Negative feelings don't do you much good.  The way to deal with them is to forgive yourself and forgive others.

Forgiveness is a tricky term.  It does not only mean that you apologize, although regretting what you did is part of it.  You may want to make amends if you can, but there are some circumstances where there is nothing more you can do.  Even when you cannot mend fences with others, you need to tell yourself:  "Yes, I did it and it would have been better if I hadn't, but now I want to forgive myself for having done that negative deed."
Forgiveness helps you come to terms with the past.  I've learned how to forgive myself, and this has helped me no longer feel deep regrets or sadness about my past.
There's a difference between using your past and wallowing in it.  Say I had an experience with a nasty person and I got nasty back, but I don't want to be that way anymore.  I can use that experience to work out a different response whenever someone is not so pleasant to me.  If I don't like my reaction, I can change my response.
You can review your past, benefit from your successes, and learn from your mistakes without judging yourself.  This is an excellent time to do a life review, to make amends, identify and let go of regrets, come to terms with unresolved relationships, and tie up loose ends.
Morrie Schwartz
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Your smiles heal you and your neighbor.

A compassionate attitude helps you communicate easily with fellow human beings. As a result, you make more genuine friends; the atmosphere is more positive, which gives you inner strength. This inner strength helps you voluntarily concern yourself with others, instead of just thinking about your own self.

Scientific research has shown that those individuals who often use words such as me, I and mine face a greater risk of a heart attack. If one always thinks of oneself, one’s thinking becomes very narrow; even a small problem appears very significant and unbearable.

When we think of others, our minds widen, and within that large space, even big personal problems may appear insignificant. This, according to me, makes all the difference.

To develop concern for others one could start by analyzing the value of negative feelings, or ill feelings, toward others. Consider what that means to you, and how you feel about yourself. Next probe the value of such a mental attitude and the value of a mind that shows concern and compassion for others.

I am suggesting that you analyze and make comparisons between these two mental attitudes. From my experience, I have found that insecurity and a lack of self-confidence brings about fears, frustration, and depression. However, if your nature changes to a selfless concern for the welfare of others, you will experience calmness, a sense of inner strength, and self-confidence.

The capacity for compassion that one has for others is the measuring rod for one’s own mental state, and compassion develops an inner strength. It is unnecessary to see the results of our acts of compassion. In some cases, our sense of compassion may not be appreciated. Many people have the impression that the practice of love, compassion, and forgiveness is of benefit to others, but will serve no specific purpose to one’s own self. I think that is wrong. These positive emotions will immediately help one’s own mental state.

By His Holiness the Dalai Lama

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Reach out for your dreams, and bring them closer to your heart.

You're good, but you're going to be great.

You're the best, but you're going to get better.

Sometimes the paths we take are long and hard, but remember: those are always the ones that lead to the most beautiful views.

Challenges come along inevitably: how you respond to them determines who you are - deep down inside - and everything you're going to be.

Increase the chances of reaching your goals by working at them gradually. The very best you can do is all that is asked of you.

Realize that you are capable of working miracles of your own making. Remember that opportunities have a reason for knocking on your door, and the right ones are there for the taking.

You don't always have to win, but you do need to know what it takes to be a winner.

It's up to you to find the key that unlocks the door to a more fulfilling life.

Understand that increased difficulty brings you nearer to the truth of how to survive it - and get beyond it.

Cross your bridges.

Meet your challenges.

Reach out for your dreams, and bring them closer and closer to your heart.

Get rid of the "if only's" and get on with whatever you need to do to get things right.

Go after what you want in life, with all the blessings of all the people who care about you. And find out what making your wishes come true really feels like.

~ Collin McCarty ~