Mess is not really the issue; it's our ability to tolerate mess that's the problem.
I've shucked and ducked "reality" more times than I care to share or admit, even to myself. It's a human reaction but it doesn't have to be our only mechanism for maintaining our mental sanity and emotional stability.
Speakers can use numbers to support key points. But too often, speakers use their data in place of key points, piling on number after number and, in the end, driving their audience to despair. Here are a few tips on how to use numbers to good effect.
So it's one thing to set the goal, it's a whole other animal to actually finish; to cross the finish line ... Here are the steps to crossing the finish line:
It's not just speaking ... when we speak to persuade.
Successful persuasion also lies in the ability to actively listen, even, and especially, in the field of public speaking.
Successful speaking to persuade relies on knowing your audience.
What are their needs and wants?
How are they thinking about your proposal?
What are they likely to favour about it?
What is going to stand in the way of them being persuaded?
What are their doubts?
What are their objections?
What are the obstacles to them moving forward with your suggestions?
Listen to them - before the presentation - survey them, talk to them, ask the event organiser about them - and listen.
Listen to them - during the presentation - ask them questions - and listen.
Successful speaking to persuade relies on seeing moments where you can gain agreement - maybe a comment or question from your audience, a situation from which you can draw an analogy, maybe a report back from a group discussion.
Listen for those and keep a line of thinking open that will allow you to use those moments to really amp up the energy of your speaking response.
Successful speaking to persuade relies on your being adaptable. It's one of the lessons I teach in my workshops and seminars on PowerPoint. Be prepared to change the course or direction of your presentation. If it seems that your audience puts value on one point or discussion over another, or if the feedback, comments or discussion suggests that a different direction would work best, then be prepared to change the structure of the presentation that you had prepared in advance.
This means that not only is your structure working for you. It also means that you are building trust. You care enough about your audience to change direction for them and you are confident enough in your material and your beliefs to change direction for them.
Listen, then, to their comments, to their suggestions and the tone of their discussions.
So I have covered three areas of listening that will build the success of your persuasive speaking - knowing your audience, watching for opportunities to ramp up the energy and being adaptable.
Do you use any other listening techniques to successfully persuade?
This is a guest post from Kwesi Millington.
Kwesi is a public speaking, storytelling & confidence coach, teaching you to speak, share, serve and live with greater confidence. Check out his website at www.CommunicateToCreate.com and do watch his periscopes. He shares some very practical tips on speaking and story.
When you speak, are your phrases littered with "um's" and "ah's"? Do filler words fill your speeches?
When I first started speaking, I HATED silence. I used to do anything to fill those silences. And when I didn't know what to say next, I filled them with the non-word no-no's that most people often use in conversation. The “Um's”, “Ah's”, “Likes” and “You knows”. It's not that the audience did not understand my speeches when I used these words, but I appeared nervous, unprepared, and less professional.
I devoted myself to working on my delivery, and once I started to eliminate these filler words, I started to be told that my messages were more powerful, and that I was a pretty good speaker!
The thing is, the messages did not change to cause improvements; I literally TOOK AWAY words to make my speeches better, instead of adding them.
Let's look at 5 strategies you can use starting now to become a, um, better speaker. These are easy to apply steps that will improve your communication and make you appear more confident. It's as easy as one word: PAUSE.
P – Practice
Rehearse Your Speech. I have heard people say they can “wing it” or that they sound staged when they prepare beforehand. If that is you, fine, but from experience, complete practice leads to calm performances. People add fillers to make up for spaces in a speech that they are not prepared for. When you practice your speech, you get to know your material inside and out. This way, if you forget a part, you can pause and let it come back to you (because you have practised), or simply move on because lets face it, YOU are the only one who knows what you forgot anyways. How do you practice? See my article on the 5Ps of Perfect Practice for more.
A – Answer
When you ask your audience a rhetorical question to your audience (ie: Have you ever had a time when...?), take a moment to quickly answer the question in YOUR mind before continuing to speak. This does 2 things: firstly, it allows the audience to absorb your question, showing that you respect them and actually want them to think about it. Secondly, it forces you to pause, in a spot that you may have otherwise used fillers. The pause makes you look more polished and professional, and then you can continue speaking at your next sentence/thought.
U – Use Everyday as Practice
I once read of a question asked of high school students. They were asked to describe a situation in 2 ways: firstly, how they would tell a police officer the situation, and secondly how they would tell their friends. In the first instance, the verbiage was very proper, and in the second it was casual with fillers and broken English. Though I do not always believe in the following statement, I do believe it applies here: The Way You do ANYTHING, is the Way You do EVERYTHING. So from now on, get in the habit of NEVER using filler words, even when talking to your family and friends. Just like an athlete spends more time practising than in the game, most of your conversations are with people you know, and a very small percentage of your life's speaking is on a stage, no matter how much you speak. So watch for filler words like um, ah, and like whenever you speak to ANYONE. Reduce then eliminate them in your daily life, and you will see that transfer to the stage.
S – Stop
When you speak, think of how you write. You add commas, semi-colons and periods in your writing. When you speak, deliberately pause where you would at these punctuation points. Many speakers are so focused on their next thought, they forget to let the last one sink in. Most people are visual learners, which means they form pictures in relation to what you say. Give them time to make those pictures, and to re-live your stories with you, by pausing at your punctuation points.
E – Enjoy Yourself
Finally, enjoy the process of speaking. You've practised, you know your material, and you have a message to share. Once you forget about being perfect and remembering everything that you want to say, you can enjoy your time on stage, SLOW down, and savour the moment. Don't worry about the time or think about getting to your next point. Enjoy the NOW, and just deliver your speech one thought at a time!
At the end of the day, as Speaker Craig Valentine says, don't look for perfection, look for connection!
