When we know deep down that we're acting with integrity despite impulses to do otherwise, we feel gates of higher energy and inspiration open inside of us."  
Dan Millman
"Each problem has hidden in it an opportunity so powerful that it literally dwarfs the problem.  The greatest success stories were created  by people who recognised a problem and turned it into an opportunity." 
 Joseph Sugarman

We may be afraid of making a decision because we are afraid of what we may have to give up, what we may have to actually do to back up that decision. We are in that conundrum because we are still operating from the win/lose model. That is the model that says you are either wrong or right you have to lose something in order to gain something else. Granted to step into our authentic life we will have to be ready to leave our old life behind, but not because our old life was wrong. We may have gained all we needed to gain and now it is time to move in another direction. A direction that will bring about an abundance of blessings, growth and a larger than life kind of life.

Making a decision that is pertinent to our life does not have to be such a huge production. There really is no win/lose in life. It is all win/win. Each direction that our path takes us is loaded with blessings, abundance and a magnificent life. Sometimes we may have walked another path instead of the one we really wanted and we then think that our life missed out on something because we did not live the life we wanted. That is another block that we place on our life and ourselves. That life we may have missed out on is not really a loss, but because we are looking so longing on a life we thought we should have had, we miss out on the life that we are actually living. So, of course, we are going to feel regret, we are going to blame ourselves and we are going to feel that we made a mistake. We are going to feel that our life could have been something bigger, better and more fabulous. That attitude will only serve to make us fall into depression and make us feel jaded with life. It is time to stop lamenting our decisions and to stop having regret over some life that we felt we should have been living.



"Play the game with the cards you have been dealt" or in other words, be thankful for the life you have been given and live your life with the life you have been given. We are given this life because we can handle it. Maybe the path that you did not get to travel was not the right path for you so life placed another path in front of you. Be thankful. The time we spend regretting a decision or the time we spend avoiding making a decision is time that we can use to motivate and uplift others. There are so many things we can do with the life that we are blessed to have been given. If we were to look back in our life our decisions have actually worked out, may be not in the way we thought it would, but overall those decisions worked out.
Make a decision for your life and the rest will fall into place. Sometimes our path is so dark that we can only see the next footstep we can take. We have got to walk in faith. We need to feel the fear and do it anyway. Take one-step at a time and soon the way will be made clear for you. Making a decision often, means that we need to leave our comfort zone and that in itself can be quite scary. We may not be happy where we are but we have gotten so comfortable in the uncomfortable-ness that we find it hard to make a step forward. No one can predict the future, however, if we fail to make the decisions that can take our life from zero to abundant living then our future will predict itself for us. Remember, no one outside of us can make the decisions that are important to our life. If we allow others to make those decisions for us we will end up where they are going and where they are going is not where our life is suppose to be. Not to mention, if we allow others to make a decision for us or to tell us what to do we may end up resenting them and ourselves when that decision does not work out or make us happy.

The Woman Behind The Counter... Who you are now does not determine who you will be.

When we make a decision for ourselves, we take away that responsibility from others. We are the leader of our life and sometimes we have to make an executive decision regarding where we desire our life to be. The quicker we make a decision the quicker the rest of our life will be able to fall into place. We have to be willing to take a flying leap of a cliff and trust that we will grow wings to help us land safely. Yes, there are times when we need to step out on faith. This is where we need to quiet our Mind and start listening to our Heart and our Soul.
Our Heart and Soul will never steer us wrong. Deep inside of us we have all the answers to our life, but we may have been programmed to listen to everyone else except ourselves. The truth is, no one outside of us knows what it is right for us. However, for us to hear the messages of our inner self we need to shut out the outside noise and take it back to ourselves. When we take the time to listen to our inner self we will then never have to regret our decisions, because we will be able to make the decisions that honours us deep in our Soul and honour the light in our Heart.

 

About the Author:

Do you want to know how you can bring more passion into your life and start thriving instead of just surviving? Trudy-Ann Ewan specializes in supporting individuals in their Journey to building a better relationship with themselves by becoming wholistically healthy so that they can create and live a passionate and powerful life. To read more on whom Trudy-Ann is, feel free to visit her website:http://www.trudyannewan.com. Feel free to contact Trudy-Ann Ewan via the website if you are interested in any of her Speaking and/or Coaching Services.

Thinking about New Year's resolutions - easy;
 
Making good resolutions - hard;


Keeping your resolutions - priceless.



 
 

You start off hopeful. You want to do better. You want to be better. You're tired of your life being one long disconnect between what you want to do and what you get around to doing.
But then reality kicks in. Like a Hamlet in the world of action, you find yourself torn between two impulses: "to do or not to do." Such ambivalence makes it tough to choose a clear commitment to action. So what happens?

Your positive energy becomes dammed, damning you to yet one more failed resolution. Your determination dissipates. It's too hard. It's too burdensome. Why kid yourself? Are you really going to shed those pounds? Get yourself in shape? Be more organized? Work more efficiently?

You surrender. It's not going to happen. You become cynical. It's stupid to make New Year's resolutions. They don't work. They're a waste of time - especially in the digital age. Beepers beckon, digital devices ding, social networks seduce. With all those accessible, appealing, addictive distractions, how does anybody stick to their resolutions?

You give up. You go back to spending countless hours immersed in activity that has nothing to do with your personal or career goals. No big deal. You only go around once, right? Why not just give in to your impulse of the moment?

Yet in those infrequent but quiet moments of solitude when you're honest with yourself, you wonder if you're teetering on the edge of the Boulevard of Broken Dreams. You know you can do better. Why give up on yourself?

This year, make resolutions that work by staying away from these three types of resolutions:

  1. Resolutions that are way too ambitious. Sure, you want to bring about dramatic change. Unfortunately, change doesn't work that way.
Instead of resolving to lose 30 pounds, aim simply to lose 5 pounds in January. But what if your goal really is to lose 30 pounds? Lose the 5 in January. Rejoice in your success. When you do, you'll be motivated to continue whatever you've been doing to lose the weight. Why? Because nothing succeeds like success.
  1. Resolutions that feel like hard work. You want to get in shape but hate going to the gym. You pay for a gym membership and promise yourself you'll go. Yeah, right. Gyms get rich on people like you. If you hate the gym, don't go.
Instead of insisting that you should do what you dislike, find a physical activity that you enjoy. Maybe it's a sport. Or a martial arts program. Or yoga. Or Pilates. Or dancing. Or cycling. Squash the "Yes, but" excuses. Just begin. And notice how much better you feel when you move your body.
  1. Resolutions that are conceptual. "I want to get more organized," is a good concept. Who wouldn't want to be more organized? (Okay, maybe if you're a nitpicking perfectionist, you might wish you were less organized).
Instead of focusing on the concept, hone in on specific actions you can take that will result in your being more organized.
Here are examples of action-oriented tasks that will enable you to reach your goal:
    • "I'll spend 15 minutes every day organizing papers on my desk."
    • "I'll discard at least 10 items of clothing that I no longer wear every change of season."
    • "I'll visit an office supply store to purchase organizing aids for my junk drawers."
Now, are you ready? Ready for what? Ready to make sustainable resolutions that will nurture your best self. Anybody against that?

 

 


 

Copyright © 2011: Linda Sapadin, Ph.D
Linda Sapadin, Ph.D. is a psychologist and success coach who specializes in helping people overcome self-defeating patterns of behavior. If your life is one long disconnect between what you intend to do and what you actually get around to doing, check out my new book, How to Beat Procrastination in the Digital Age.

At my website SixStylesofProcrastination.com, you can take a personality quiz. View a chart that describes the thinking, speaking and acting modes of each procrastination style. Read inspirational quotes just for procrastinators. And if you're pleased with your accomplishments but recognize how much easier it would be with a tailwind at your back, explore my coaching services


An old college friend and accomplished writer, John Scalzi, recently posted a list of writing tips for non-professionals, which I'd highly recommend for professionals and non-professionals alike. One of his most unusual suggestions is to "speak what you write" -- literally, to read your writing out loud before publishing, whether in a blog post or just an e-mail to friends. This, he argues, will not only help catch spelling and other errors (each of which Scalzi says decreases the writer's apparent IQ by 5 to 10 points), but also help you see whether you're conveying the meaning you intend.

So what does psychology research have to say about this notion? (No, not that typos decrease your IQ, but the larger idea that reading your words out loud will help you determine if your meaning is clear.)

A team led by Justin Kruger conducted a series of experiments on how we perceive each other's intentions in e-mail, and their findings do have some relevance to Scalzi's claims. One common problem in e-mails is deciding whether your correspondent is being serious or sarcastic. Taking Scalzi's example, most readers will realize that one of his observations was sarcastic: your IQ doesn't literally decrease when you make a spelling error. But what about the advice given by the aptly-named blogger Grumpy old Bookman, who in response to the much-hyped controversy over fabrications in James Frey's memoir, suggested that authors literally make everything up, taking no inspiration from the real world? Most commenters to that post clearly thought he was being serious, but I have little doubt that the post was intended to be sarcasm (I also think he anticipated that many readers wouldn't "get it" -- and that was part of the joke).



But do most writers actually accurately anticipate how readers will perceive the tone of their writing? Kruger's team tested sixty pairs of students at Cornell University, asking each person to choose 10 statements from a list of 20. Each person had a different list; on both lists, some of the statements were sarcastic, and some were serious. In separate rooms, one member of the pair typed each of the chosen statements into an e-mail message. The other member recorded the statements with a tape recorder. Each person guessed whether the message recipient would be able to identify the statements correctly as sarcastic or serious; then they listened or read their partners' messages and indicated whether they actually thought the message was sarcastic. Here are the results:

While both e-mailers and talkers thought most sentences would be read accurately, e-mail recipients couldn't judge whether sarcasm was intended -- their readers guessed their intentions at a rate no better than chance. By contrast, people speaking sarcastic messages were accurately able to guess when recipients would see the sarcasm. Message recipients were also asked to say how confident they were in their understanding of the message, and again, whether reading e-mails or listening to recordings, nearly everyone believed they had accurately judged the message's intent.

So talking appears to be a better way of conveying sarcasm than e-mail. But what about Scalzi's advice -- can saying what you write actually help you better understand how your written message will be taken?

In a new experiment, pairs of volunteers e-mailed each other as before, but before they guessed how their message would be taken, they recorded

the statements on a tape recorder. Half of the group read the statements as intended, using a sarcastic voice for the sarcastic statements, and a serious voice for serious statements. The other half read them using the opposite intonation: a sarcastic voice for serious statements and a serious voice for sarcastic statements. Here are the results:

When people read the statements with the same intonation as they intended to convey, they were wildly inaccurate at guessing whether readers would judge the statements' intentions correctly -- in fact, readers again were barely better than chance. But when e-mailers tried reading the statements with the opposite intonation, their guesses as to how readers would perform exactly matched actual performance. So here is a case where speaking what you write does appear to help you understand whether readers will read your message the way you intend it to be read.

Kruger and his team argue that their study demonstrates that writers are generally overconfident about what their readers will understand. While confidence about our writing matches our confidence about speaking, in reality, we're less able to convey those intentions in writing. Amazingly, readers, too, believe they can effectively judge the writer's intent, so the potential for miscommunicating in e-mail is amplified. The research also appears to support Scalzi's claim that "speaking what you write" can improve writing, with a caveat: to better understand the potential for misreading, you should try to read your words using an intonation opposite what you intend.

As for the link between spelling errors and IQ, more research will be needed before a definitive answer can be reached (seriously!).

Kruger, J., Epley, N., Parker, J., & Ng, Z. (2005). Egocentrism over e-mail: Can we communicate as well as we think? Journal of Personality and Social Psychology 89(6), 925-936.

Posted by Dave Munger on Cognitive Daily

 

You may also be interested in:

Manage your e-mail so that it does not rule your workday

Top-Ten Email Management Tips

The U2 Method of High-Impact Writing

Three tips to improve your writing rhythm

Is there something you've always meant to do, wanted to do, but just ... haven't? Matt Cutts suggests: Try it for 30 days. This short, lighthearted talk offers a neat way to think about setting and achieving goals. Matt Cutts is an engineer at Google, where he fights linkspam and helps webmasters understand how search

works

Take Control of Your PaperAs part of my 7 Days of Christmas promotion, this eBook, Take Control of Your Paper, is available for the special price of just $7.00 (Normal price $14.95)!

This eBook will show you how to control your paper flow.

Techniques to use to control the flow of paper in your life.

How to tidy your desk most effectively, make it attractive, and implement systems so that it stays that way.

How to create a filing system that works for you.

Ways to stay on top of the paper avalanche.

Set up systems so that you can find the information when you need it, and you can keep control of what has to be done and when.

This offer is only available until 5 p.m. Thursday 19th December. Get it here >> http://bit.ly/1bwjHHG

Here are 3 great reasons to leverage your time and understand its impact on your productivity.

Reason #1. By studying how you use your time you will be a better manager and increase your ability to focus on the most important areas of your life and your business.

Do you know where your time goes? Try keeping a time study log. For a specified period of time, maybe a week, write down everything that you do. Yes, everything. At the end of the day take a few minutes to review how you used your time. Were there times when you could have been more productive (i.e. waiting in a doctor's office, driving to work or a meeting)? Are there times of the day that you are more productive compared with others?

Here are some tips to help you stay focused:

1. Stay Hydrated

2. Take a quick walk (around the block or the office) to get up and away from your desk

3. Listen to some upbeat music to refocus your energy.

Reason #2. Leveraging Your Time Allows You to Achieve Your Goals Faster and More Efficiently
Do you have a set of written goals? Do you review them each day before you begin the day's journey? When you use your time wisely and don't waste time on non-important matters you get closer to your goals. Just the simple process of organizing your day can make you feel less stressed and more in control.
Here are some tips to make sure you reach your goals faster:

1. Write Down Your Goals

2. Organize Your Day (organizing your day into 10 or 15 minute blocks can be a great way to plan for all size projects.

3. Allow Time For Yourself (don't be afraid to take that break and refresh)

Reason #3. Leveraging Your Time (Really understanding the answer to, "Where did the day go?" helps you to continuously improve and learn. Learning helps you to keep producing good materials and products. Never stop learning, reading, trying new things and implementing them.

Here are some tips for making sure you never stop learning:

1. Write down your accomplishments and celebrate

2. Write down your challenges and ask others for support, ideas, and collaborative solutions

3. Find one new book, article, blog, etc. every day to keep you inspired and freshly focused

Leveraging your time only works when you leverage it in the right direction. Focus your energy and free yourself from the overwhelm of your day when you feel like you are drowning in the details. Take charge of your day, take charge of your week, reach your greatest potential by leveraging your time.

..................................................

To discover how you can learn more about leveraging your time and living by your goals visit http://www.livingbyyourgoals.com and sign up for our training today!
This article was brought to you by the Office of Community Research, Inc. and Jennifer L. McGahan,
We are committed to helping your community grow stronger, healthier and more resilient by building capacity through education and opportunity. Visit our website today: http://www.officeofcommunityresearch.com

 

No One Can Do What You Do?
Who can do what you do? The reason a shortage exists in the field of teaching is simply because few can do what you do. The teaching profession is profoundly unique. In some areas of the country, a shortage is impacted by economics; other places are effected by geography and weather. For the most part, metropolitan cities have fewer issues in recruiting teachers than smaller, less populous locations. Nonetheless, the field of teaching is unique and shortages prove that few have the calling and desire to do what more than 3.1 million public and private educators are already doing. Let's look at some of the reasons teaching is unique and why shortages are common across the country, specifically in specialized subject areas such as science, math, and special education.
There are seven ways in which teachers/educators are unique professionals:
First, we've already established the fact that teachers embrace the field of education as a calling not as a job. Let's face it, teaching is a very complex and demanding career that requires teachers to be managers of people, analyzers of data, and researchers of best practices and instructional methodologies-and these skills are utilized each day. In any other major profession that required the same unique qualifications, teachers would make significantly more money. Undoubtedly, the salaries for teachers must be reexamined and adjusted to reflect the uniqueness of the profession and provide balanced scales for all teachers, whether they work in a big city or a small town or country hamlet.
Second, teachers are also unique because the profession is now driven by so much data. Teachers must now be statisticians and researchers, fully accountable in some form or fashion for managing data in the areas of assessment, attendance, graduation rates, discipline percentages, and gifted and special education progress. The administrative responsibilities of the teacher have definitely increased, but the resources necessary to make the management of these duties efficient are minimal. The new demand for data is needed, and critical to enhancing results, but resources are likewise needed to help teachers be effective and efficient in collecting, examining, and utilizing the data.
Third, teachers are required to be learning and behavioral specialists and to be able to apply differentiated instruction. Differentiated instruction is a newly celebrated philosophy, and a mandate for all teachers, that requires teachers to find effective teaching strategies that will meet the needs of students with different learning styles, all in the same classroom at the same time. Teachers must, then, be competent and active in enlisting the unique resources and skills necessary to meet the needs of kinesthetic, visual, and auditory learning styles. Additionally, the special challenges of addressing emotional behavioral disorders, learning disabilities, and attention deficit problems-all in the same classroom-broaden the gap between teachers and managers. Today's teachers are practitioners, researchers, and change agents; but, none of these unique skills are recognized or rewarded.
Fourth, continuing on the same theme, teachers must work with every child, despite the challenges of that child. In nearly every other profession, management is able to pick out the bad product or the poor employee so that productivity and quality can be increased. Educators do not have that same luxury. Instead, public education demands that every child be given the resources and opportunity to succeed. This includes those students who truly want to learn and will become good "products" and those students who get energized from wreaking havoc and chaos in school by fighting, dealing drugs, taking part in gang activity, or constantly disrupting classes.
Instead of weeding out the bad students, educators are required to manage all situations, to provide alternatives to parents, and to somehow effectively guide troubled students through the educational process. And teachers realize that they must do so, regardless of social and economic situations and, in some cases, the lack of positive parental guidance that might influence the behavior of the student. What becomes most frustrating is recognizing that, if these challenging students refuse the positive alternatives, they may end up dead, in jail, or in a hospital or wallowing in a continuing cycle of poverty. No one gets into teaching to celebrate such a potential loss of lives and potential. Teachers get into the business to change and enhance lives-uniquely, and one by one, as needed.
Fifth, teachers are unique because the line of accountability in education has many levels and tangents. This accountability is not necessarily a bad thing, but it has added to the complexity of teaching. In one way or another, teachers are impacted by the federal government, a state department of education, the local school district, and administration at their school. What does this mean for teachers? It means that the results of classroom practices go far beyond the classroom, students, parents, and principals. I can't name another career field that has as many accountability variables and levels as does the field of public education. As a teacher-educator, be aware that your individual results in the classroom are data and will be analyzed as data and that those results will be evaluated in ways that are unique to the field of education. Your successes or failures in the classroom, as reflected in the data, will impact your longevity in the field of education.
Sixth, educators are unique in that no other professional group manages so many people and is so responsible for individual progress. Teachers work with up to one hundred and eighty students or more each day and are required to ensure that each of those students succeeds academically. Young people, from the ages of four to twenty, are instructed, counseled, directed, nurtured, motivated, inspired, and coached by teachers-a cycle that continues until high school graduation, in best-case scenarios.
You may be surprised to know that children spend more time at school than they do awake at home and that children are influenced by more adults in school than in any other social circle. That makes the public school system the single most influential force on children-more so even than church. Teaching, then, is a unique career that is faced with high liability and tremendous responsibility-because real lives are dependent on competent and professional adults. These demands are tremendous, and very few people can meet them successfully.
Lastly, teaching is unique because it is the only profession where the federal government has mandated absolute perfection. Specifically, the No Child Left Behind Act requires that all children-that's 100 percent-reach proficiency on state level assessments. Between the lines, this legislation essentially requires teachers to provide effective and rigorous instruction, which will hopefully translate into providing the necessary skills and information sets so that students can be literate and competent. However, the mandate that all students be made to pass assessments is largely unrealistic because of unforeseen and calculable variables that prohibit the attainment of such a goal. Yes, the goal is lofty, but it is worthy. The expectation that teachers teach is warranted. At the end of the day, we all know that students must be able to think and apply their knowledge in real life. After all, primary and secondary schooling is a training ground with the ultimate goal of preparing young people to successfully navigate college, a profession, and the world of adults. But the attainment of such an idealistic goal as what is outlined in No Child Left Behind creates an all-consuming stress that has hurt and will continue to hurt the teaching profession if not taken in stride.
As this federal policy stands, I expect it to cause numerous educators to leave the profession-not one scientist or researcher would ever purport to achieve 100 percent accuracy on any research or experiment due to variables. Even 99.9 percent acknowledges the influence of some variables, even if it is only 0.1 percent. Yet, in the world of education, teachers must live with and comply to that unrealistic federal mandate or find a new line of business, which could be extremely detrimental to hundreds of districts across the country.
So, yes, teaching is unique, and it requires educators to be multi-faceted and multi-talented. It is my strong belief that very few professions demand what is required of teachers in the public sector. The demands are not necessarily bad, but they are indications of the complex nature of the teaching profession. Those who are cut out for this unique profession are called, often naturally skilled or highly and thoroughly trained, and committed to success. And, no, not everyone is cut out for a career in the most challenging occupation on the planet. It also requires an awareness of self. And, it is not for the weary. No, not everyone can do what teachers do. Join the movement - The Teachers Movement and make a difference.
..................................................
Dr. Graysen Walles Author, Reasons to Keep Teaching: The Greatest Career on the Planet http://theteachersmovement.com


How do you feel about wastebaskets? That's right, you read that correctly - your attitude toward your wastebasket will have a profound and  - yea verily -- mystical impact on your paper clutter.

Do not - I repeat DO NOT - think of your wastebasket as an evil enemy who gobbles up all your important data.  It is your sweet and kind, loyal and true friend who needs to be nurtured and fed.

So feed your wastebasket.

Also, buy a wastebasket for every spot in which paper clutter accumulates. You might whine, "But a wastebasket looks dumb in my dining room." And to that I retort, "Pray tell, do you think all that paper stacked on your dining room table has an intelligent look ... as opposed to that dumb-looking wastebasket?

Now here is a wondrous fact about wastebaskets: they come in attractive colours and styles. Yes, they do. You may even find one that you love.

BEWARE: When you go on your wastebasket-shopping-binge, don't buy little bitty teeny-tiny dainty ones unless you have little bitty teeny-tiny dainty stacks of papers. If you have mega-paper clutter like most of us, then you need mega-wastebaskets.  Lots of them.

 


 

 

Rita Emmett - Recovering Procrastinator  PROFESSIONAL SPEAKER: Keynotes & Seminars on Increasing Productivity & Conquering Procrastination; also strategies to Prevent Burnout such as "While You Take Care of Others, Who Takes Care of You?" and "Are We Having Any Fun Yet?"
Email:  Rita@RitaEmmett.com
http://www.RitaEmmett.com
Phone: 847-699-9950