public speaking - Pivotal

Public speaking

The Holy Grail for speakers

So what if we were asked to define the Holy Grail for speakers?

What would you say?

This has me intrigued now.

So the Holy Grail is a feeling?

What is that feeling?

For me, then,

the feeling is natural

not forced,

confident without being egotistical,

though sometimes a performance.

It is uplifting,

a quiet satisfaction sometimes,

sometimes exhilarating.

It is absolute connection,

shared laughs, emotional highs, and sad lows,

sudden understanding

and joy in discovery,

all shared.

That is me, the speaker, but what about the listener,

the audience member,

what does that person see as the Holy Grail of speaking,

of being in an audience?

What does that feel like?

And I, like you, have sat in an audience, just as we have stood or sat or walked as the speaker.

What is that feeling, as an audience?

We wanted to feel that connection

that experience,

those emotions,

the energy,

those shared learnings,

that absolute connection.

Sometimes we wanted to be the only person in that audience, alone in the experience,

at other times we felt kinship with all the others sitting or standing or online beside us.

We wanted to trust,

for the feeling of communication to be natural,

unforced.

We wanted to feel somehow changed by the experience,

more prepared to face our challenges,

validated in our choices already made,

motivated to go ahead,

uplifted, entertained, bemused,

if only for the duration of the presentation.

Is this the holy grail of speaking,

and does it exist,

has it ever existed???????

Public Speaking – a mountain without a peak

florian

I don't like it.

I like Florien Mueck.

If you can get to his YouTube channel, do, he's worth watching.

But I wish he hadn't said that, or hadn't been quoted as saying that.

Starting with a negative.

No, there is no perfection.

I live in a household of sporting people, and the shelves are lined with trophies. In any sporting competition, there are distinct winners and losers. A swimming race, say, takes a measured amount of time and the fastest wins. Simple and cut-and-dried (usually!)

A speech on the other hand ... well! I have won many speaking competitions since about the age of 12. I have lost just as many. People come to me afterwards and tell me they thought I won. Sometimes I agreed, sometimes not. Despite the number of very well articulated criteria, there will always be that element of subjectivity involved. I know. I also judge!

So if there is no cut-and-dried "best" speaker, how can there ever be a "perfect" speaker, or a perfect speech?

Perfect according to whom? Perfect according to what criteria?

What if, on the other hand, we went to the second part of this quote and look at a speaking high.

What does that look like? What does that feel like?

To me, it feels like being in flow

- speaking fluently and with enthusiasm

- connecting with members of the audience so that they respond with emotion, or they participate

- it can feel powerful

- it can feel gratifying

- it can feel something close to perfection

And if we looked at the audience members after the speech, they would be doing what we, as speakers, aimed to have them do - repeating, remembering, rehiring, buying, changing, being motivated, or any number of other things we had designed.

It's what keeps me speaking, meeting the challenge to be the best I can be, to climb higher and higher towards

no, not a mountain top,

not a peak

not perfection even, whatever that may be,

but certainly to more highs and greater heights.

And of course the corollary is that we all need to avoid becoming complacent, thinking that there is no better in us, no better experience we an provide, no need to strive or create anything new or better.

So, yes, Florian, I agree with you, and the quote stirred me to do that!!

And it's what I want for all of us here - you, Florian, me and all of our fellow speakers and readers.

audience attention, audience in public speaking, emotion in public speaking, public speaking

[Quick Public Speaking Tip] One of the Secret Ingredients that Create Memorability

ingredient

Memorability is important for us speakers, as it is for anyone building a brand, creating change, inspiring action, or wanting to be rehired.

If you want your audience to remember your message, there are several wonderful ingredients you can add to the mix.

Today let's look at this one

... create an emotional connection.

Maya Angelou is quoted as saying “I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”

When you make an emotional connection, you open up the pathways in your audience’s brains that facilitate recall. Whatever you associate with that emotion will be retained along with the emotion, in their memories.

If you want to introduce a new way of thinking or doing for your audience to adopt, create an emotional connection. Having already researched your audience, you should have some idea of what excites them, what they cry about, what their problems are. And you can use that information to connect to their emotions. Use examples that will push those buttons, appeal to what matters to them most.

Tell stories that create an emotion.

Use words that heighten emotion.

Use emotive verbs. Rather than “she said” use “she screamed”, rather than “he went” use “he raced”. Give your adjectives and adverbs the same treatment.

You can watch your audience as you go, and get a feel for what moves them.

It is also a fact that while statistics and logic and facts and figures are useful in supporting a point, they will not have the power over your audience that emotion does. People will make decisions (and give you their attention) based on emotions … and justify them afterwards with logic.

So create an emotional connection with your audience and mix it in and around your facts, statistics and testimonials to engage your audience, have them remember your message and be open to making changes in their lives.

Books, public speaking, speeches

A promise of success – The Official guide to TED Talks

ted_talks TED Talks: The Official TED Guide to Public Speaking Hardcover
– May 3, 2016
by Chris Anderson

At long last - what promises to be the definitive guide to public speaking, well to TED talks anyway (and no, I haven't read it, and will wait for the Kindle edition, I think. It should be worth waiting for.)

Who wouldn't want to be a speaker for TED? The whole system provides wonderful exposure. The discipline of being limited to 18 minutes ensures a tight, well constructed speech. There is professional coaching for all speakers.

Since taking over TED in the early 2000s, Chris Anderson has shown how carefully crafted short talks can be the key to unlocking empathy, stirring excitement, spreading knowledge, and promoting a shared dream. Done right, a talk can electrify a room and transform an audience’s worldview. Done right, a talk is more powerful than anything in written form.

Many people have shared their understanding of the magic behind TED talks, Carmine Gallo especially.

And now we can all share in the secrets behind the speeches. I guess it will be disappointing to some that there is no formula, but heartening, nevertheless since we become inured of formulae. No two speeches should be the same.

As Sir Ken Robinson said,

Is there a single recipe for a great speech? Of course not. But there are some essential ingredients, which the TED team sets out here with concision, verve and wit (which are also some of the ingredients). An inspiring, contemporary guide to the venerable arts of oratory. Sir Ken Robinson

'Nobody in the world better understands the art and science of public speaking than Chris Anderson. He is absolutely the best person to have written this book' Elizabeth Gilbert.

He coached her, along with the other TED speakers who have inspired us the most, Sir Ken Robinson, Amy Cuddy, Bill Gates, Salman Khan, Dan Gilbert, Mary Roach, Matt Ridley, and so many more,and has shared tips from their presentations.

Anderson lists his five key techniques to presentation success: Connection, Narration, Explanation, Persuasion and Revelation (plus the three to avoid). He also answers the most frequently asked questions about giving a talk, from 'What should I wear?' to 'How do I handle my nerves?'.

The promise ...

For anyone who has ever been inspired by a TED talk…

...this is an insider’s guide to creating talks that are unforgettable.

I suspect that it very well might be and look forward to reading it.

You can buy the book from Amazon, The Book Depository , Fishpond

acting, authenticity in public speaking, fear of public speaking, Public speaking, public speaking anxiety, public speaking confidence, public speaking nerves

The speaker struggle between "performing" and being "authentic"

performing_authentic

I am writing this as the world mourns David Bowie.

Something Bowie said reminded me about the dichotomy that we all face, in public speaking, between "performing" and being "authentic."

Many of my clients come to me because they are deterred from speaking by their fear of "performing" this thing called public speaking, fear of not adequately meeting some set of criteria, and of losing their self and their real message in that performance. .

Many of you will know how much of a struggle the dichotomy has been for me. I spent many years entering (and winning my fair share) of public speaking competitions. It is a world unto itself, competitive public speaking, bound by rules, and it involves speaking knowing that one is being judged (a nervous beginner's worst nightmare, and daunting for the old hands as well!).

So for all those years I operated within that world and its rules, doing well, but constantly feeling the weird dislocation of communicating with an audience via a strict set of guidelines.

It has been incredibly liberating to give up the concept of being judged as a performer.

But still the dichotomy remains - authenticity is vital and yet performance has to be factored in. They must still be in balance.

And for me, and for many others like me, there is also the strange "lure" of performance, threatening to pull that balance awry in a different direction.

Two "events" that have crossed my path in the last couple of weeks have really highlighted this "lure" of performance.

The death of David Bowie was one but before that ...

You might also be aware of my interest/obsession (!) with Outlanders, the series of books ... and with the TV series, how it is being made ...

and with the lead actor who is a consummate professional on and off stage.

(The fact that his good looks are highlighted at every opportunity doesn't hurt either, but it's not the main source of my interest.!)

The image below is from an Instagram post. He has had to work out to create the build of the character, Jamie. But he is also very involved in charities and one program he runs is a fitness/goal achievement challenge from which the funds go to one of those charities. In the course of this fundraising he has had to endure photo shoots for a cross-fit magazine, to promote this fundraiser.

When you finish enjoying what he has achieved in terms of the physique, maybe you can read the text ...

and see that possibility - of creating a performance, or a mask, behind which to hide the real you.

Where would you say this lies on the spectrum between authenticity and performing?

The second event, was the demise of David Bowie - a shock to the world. He was an icon of our age. Meant so much to so many people for so many reasons. He strummed our pain. He gave us possibilities outside our squares. He provided sheer entertainment and amazing music. He stimulated our creativity. He gave us solace.

Many of us are now listening to his latest and final recording for the hints he embedded about his attitude to life ... and to death.

Even at the end, he was orchestrating his life. In 1976 he told Playboy "I've now decided that my death should be very precious. I really want to use it. I'd like my death to be as interesting as my life has been and will be."

We are now looking back at the latest album, at the quotations, and connecting the dots back from the death of an icon. And in my efforts to do just that I found this quote which I put into a graphic.

Both of these beautiful, thoughtful, creative professionals, expressing the concept of a separate persona or mask in order to perform or "expose" oneself.

So there it is ...

and while I do see performance as a lure, mindful as I am of lingering memories of old experiences, I also find in it support for my theory that

introverts make the best speakers!

And the dichotomy remains!

After lots of experience and deliberation, and now these two events, I have reached this ...

that the compromise between performance and being yourself comes, I think, down to two things -

being your best self

and playing the game with your audience.

What do you think?

[Quotation about public speaking] Less is more

You may also be interested in these articles

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If you struggle to keep your presentations simple, my Message Clarity process may help.

It's guided brainstorming, with you, in person or via Skype, to pinpoint and define your message and to focus the content so that you create engagement, so that you achieve the outcomes you want from your presentation, and so that you and your message are ... unforgettable. Go here to let me know the details of your presentation and what you want to achieve, and I will let you know how we will go about achieving it. Click here to Get that clarity now!

Public speaking

Go Viral! Use these 8 secrets from viral internet content and go viral yourself – be admired and rehired as a speaker.

What is it that will make you go viral - become admired and rehired as a speaker?

What is it that will have audiences flocking to your presentations where they will engage with you, and change or act or think differently as a result of their experience?

Afterwards, their conversations will be about your presentation; stimulated by the experience, providing positive feedback to you … and to event coordinators!

And if there’s one thing event coordinators love, it’s speakers who come recommended, and with their own fan base.

What makes people tweet your sound bytes? What makes them recommend your presentation and share it? What makes them give that positive feedback?

“I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel” ~ Maya Angelou

The answer lies in the viral elements you embed in your presentations. These are the elements that create an experience for your audience, make them feel something, involve them. They catch and keep attention. They heighten the impact. They are then held in the memory, and shared later. They are the elements that make internet content go viral and that you can use to build your own reputation.

Here are 8 specific elements that provide those experiences on the internet - making people want to share, and making others want to click and experience for themselves – that you can use in your speaking to make you and your message “go viral”.

1. Tell a story
People are used to watching stories on screens – in the theatre, on television and computer. A piece of content that tells a story, on the internet, then, automatically captures attention and draws an audience in immediately. They follow along with the story, waiting for the entertainment or the learning that they expect from a story. Your audiences, too, have been hardwired by a long history of storytelling to automatically tune in to a story, giving you instant engagement - in the same way. You then have the opportunity to draw them in with you, into the story, its emotional arc and its “moral”. Make it vivid enough, make it work to communicate a point, and you have created that element, that experience, that feeling; a memory to be valued and shared.

2. Appeal to an emotion
May Angelou’s quote says it all. Emotion on its own is a means for content to go viral, and for you to create an element that people will remember from your presentation. It can by funny (think videos of babies laughing) or sad (family loss or cancer’s ravages), moving or stupid, cute (all those Facebook videos of cute animals) strange or gross. Create an emotion to associate with your message and attract “hits” - attention, and “shares” – recommendations.

3. Add a roller-coaster to the emotion …
and you multiply the effect. You may have seen the Dove “sketches” video. It utilises this effect well, as the women, originally challenged and then gradually coming to realise that they are seen as more beautiful than they see themselves. The emotion swells. This is storytelling at its best.

4. Be Positive/Uplifting
While it may seem that we are addicted to negative news and all that is awful, there are many pieces of viral internet content that are successful because they inspire us and show us that, as humans, we can be good, kind, tolerant. The video “Validation” is just one. Inspire your audience and you create an experience that they value, remember and share.

5. Use the unexpected
People love surprise. They love the unexpected. The “Gangnam style” video had an element of the unexpected (along with “humour” and a human element that people could relate to!) And the Pepsi ad “Test Drive” was based around the unexpected. If you can create this element in your presentation you engage your audiences, you add it to your speaker brand and you can make it a powerful viral element.

6. Use a compelling opening
Open with a bang, something that captures attention right from the start, and you have your audience focused on you and your content. You can use something we have already listed – a story, something unexpected, something emotionally evocative. Or use something guaranteed to get attention that the audience shares, such as geographical humour, reference to a local or international celebrity or an event you all shared. But open with a bang and follow up with content that is equally engaging and you have the elements of an experience, a viral speech.

7. Inform your audience. Open their minds
The classic internet example, of course, is the TED talks which show new ways of thinking about their topics. If you can present a unique viewpoint on a subject, a point that creates “lightbulb” experiences, then you can establish yourself as a thought-leader in your niche. People will be drawn to your presentations for the insight you can provide; just as the appellation of ”TED talk” draws internet users time and again to those speakers.

8. No ads
There are so many advertising videos produced now that are produced simply to go viral, and there is very little mention of the product. Evian’s “Baby and me” is a great example, and so is the Dove ad we mentioned before, and the numbers are climbing rapidly. These companies are very aware of the role of the story, the unexpected, and the way it can create such an experience that viewers remember that and then make the connection to the product. We as speakers can relax in this knowledge, especially since no audience wants a “salesy” presentation. Make your “sale” whatever it is, secondary to your great content and you still can be successful.

In the end, what you are providing is a memorable experience for your audience and that experience is heightened by the viral elements you use. Begin with your compelling opening, and then provide an experience that moves people and gives them new ways of thinking about things and you will

• have them engaged and focused on you and your message
• have them remembering, repeating, acting on and sharing you and your message.
• impress event coordinators who see that you come with recommendations, that their delegates are engaged and responding, are being moved to change and are talking about the speaker they chose.

Want success as a speaker? Go viral!

Public speaking

How to become a better speaker

Each difficult moment has the potential to open my eyes and open my heart

We learn from our mistakes.

It's been a hard lesson to learn, but I'm learning.

Mistakes are not failures.

Difficulties are not the end.

A speech that challenges in some way is not a reason to give up speaking.

Every time there is a difficulty, it is not the end but a sign post.

It is an indicator that something needs to be altered to avoid that difficulty next time, and therefore become a better speaker.

Are you nervous, perhaps to the point of not speaking at all? Then look at those nerves and see how they may be changed.

Did you not get the results you hoped for?

Did you have a difficulty with the equipment?

Did you have difficulty with the audience response?

There are a myriad of issues we face when we speak, but each one is a sign post to improvement, a trigger to open our eyes to how we can be better and to open our hearts so that we understand and forgive ourselves and better serve our audiences.

[Note to self - and you if you happen to be in the vicinity] Next time you find me beating myself up over some error/mistake/failure, please will you just remind me of the wonderful improvements that lie ahead for me. Thank you!

Quotations, Quotes - public speaking

[Quotation about public speaking] The success of your presentation depends on more than your knowledge

Public speaking

Speaking and branding lessons from a sandwich board

I am writing this after a scrumptious dinner in a town in the north of our state called Townsville. I am looking out over moon-sparkled water and the dark mass of almost-tropical islands close off-shore ...

... a holiday-inspired article which nevertheless applies to all of us who speak and to those of us, also, who work on branding our businesses.

And I was inspired, today as we wandered down the main street of the town full of historical buildings and more modern businesses.

There it was. This sandwich board.

It caught my eye and then my imagination.

I had to go back and look again.

And what made it do that?

There are three reasons and they are all techniques we can use in our speaking and our branding to have people caught, intrigued and going back for another look (or listen).

1. She used Alliteration

All those Ps!

It's a beautiful rhetorical and literary device, alliteration, and it creates an effect called foregrounding

It creates a little hitch in the flow of attention, a little distraction. People might not even be aware that you used it, but they will be drawn to the words and their meaning. with a slight sense of intrigue.

If we count Pre-Push as one word, there is also anther device called the Rule of Three operating here. Create a list of three or a group of three and we have the same effect - that slight sense of interruption and something special.

2. She used Humour

(I'm using the word "she" because I met the owner of the establishment as I was taking a photo. She had a beautiful smile and very graciously and humbly accepted my exclamations about her marketing and my explanation that I wanted to use her work to share with you.)

I have never seen "Pre-push" used before.

Have you?

And even if you have, you have to admit it has flair.

It is a classic humour device - using the unexpected.

It made me smile and if we can make our audiences smile, we have them a little more open to feeling that we are likeable, that they can trust and believe our message.

3. She used an image

It's a subtle reinforcement, this image, of just what is meant by "Pre-push", and has a strong sense of the feminine, aimed, no doubt, at the target client, or perhaps her significant others.

We use images, too, to support our points when we speak. We don't need them to be distracting from our message, nor do we want them to be offensive.

(... and yes I have blocked out one of the words in the promotion in case you were offended or distracted by it!!)

So if you are in Townsville. Queensland, Australia and in need of some pampering, pre-push, I recommend you check out Bellanova.

And if you are in front of an audience, either presenting or online, I recommend you check out the lessons from her sandwich board, They are simple, subtle and powerful!!

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